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No More Naked Boy

February 6, 2010

The third grade year is one of great change.  It’s the year children become more independent.  Their teachers stop leading them around, spoon-feeding them on what to do and when.  To me, it’s the beginning of the loss of innocence.  Sadly, I knew it was coming.  Thought I had prepared myself for it.  As usual, I was wrong.

The first clue came when Mommy suddenly became Mom, or rather Mmmmaaaaahhhhhmmmm!  How could I not see it?  Mom, don’t hold my hand!   Mom, you’re embarrassing me!  Mom, I can do it!  I do have a college degree, took twice the amount of psych and child psych classes I needed.  Yet I was still so blind.  Or, can we all say, denial ?

The next big shocker came at Christmas time.  It really caught both myself and my husband off guard.  Mom, you know there is no Santa Claus, it’s really you and Dad!  I was heart-broken and pouted for a week.  Oh, of course we had the big discussion.  You know, the one about how we really believe in the spirit of Santa and giving and how God sent His Son, and on and on .  All our 8 yr. old would say was, come on, I know Daddy hides the presents in his trunk.  I could feel the white hairs actually shoot from my brain.

The final straw came sometime in January.  I tried to bring a wash cloth to him while he was  starting to take a bath.  It had never been a problem before. I should have seen it coming. Out came the loud and drawn out,

MOM, GET OUT OF HERE!  I’M OKAY!  GET OUT! 

I just want to bring you a washcloth.  Do you have a towel?

MOM!!!!!  GET OUT!!!  I”M OKAY!!!!!!!    GET OUT!!!

Geez, I’m not looking, you don’t have to yell.  Do you have a washcloth and towel?

YES!!!!!!!  NOW GET OUT!!!!!!!

It was then I finally got it.  My baby boy was really growing up.  I was no longer Mommy, I was Mom.  There would be no more pictures with Santa.  Yet, I think the thing that I will miss most is my super-hero, “Naked Boy”.  Oh, Naked Boy was terrific.  He was free and happy and full of energy.  He would run around the house, naked, giggling and laughing all the way.  We would yell, there goes Naked Boy, being naked.  We would all laugh at the exploits of Naked Boy.  We loved his exuberance and the proud way he would stop, arms and legs spread in a wide stance, and smile and laugh while we cheered him on. 

The next morning, while driving my son to school, I asked him,

Soooo, no more “Naked Boy”?  I kind of miss him.

With as sheepish grin he said, 

 Yeah, me too.  He was fun wasn’t he?

Another School Project

January 28, 2010

I can’t believe it!  My son got an “A” on his science test!  I know he will need therapy when he grows up for that wacky study session, but at least he got an “A”.  I cried when he brought home that beautiful “A”.  Maybe we can go to therapy together!  Heaven knows I need it now!

What a difference a day makes.  Tonight we worked on his social studies project.  His class is studying landforms.  My son could have picked volcano, mountain, but he picked bay.  Inside my head was screaming, how on earth are we going to make a bay?  But we did it, and had fun too!

There is a beautiful bay, in a boot box, sitting on my dining room table.  We had so much fun painting, glueing, creating!  I even got kisses as we did it. Not one yell, not one argument, just pure mother and son time.  I was in heaven.  This was how I envisioned it would be with my son. Why it was a scene straight from the Ossie and Harriet show.   The two of us, having fun together, creating, learning, sharing, growing.  I should have videotaped it because I don’t even believe it actually happened.  But there sits the box, a blue sky with clouds, a bay with waves, a shore line, rocks, grass, a path to the dock that even has a leggo boat waiting to go fishing in the bay.  That box represent a little bit of heaven, not just a bay, but a great experience making it.  At least we will have one positive experience to share with our therapist someday. 🙂

Homework Headaches!

January 25, 2010

For 2 hours I was the epitome of motherly love.  I was soft voiced, gently coaxing my son to study for his science test tomorrow.  We laughed together as I made funny comparisons to help him understand types of soils, rocks and minerals.  He did seem to be trying to understand, for the most part at least.  I did it all without the help of my beloved xanax. 

Then, it happened.  We began to answer the test questions at the end of the chapter.  God help me, I snapped.  We had just spent 2 hours going over the same terms many times, and he could not answer the simplest question!  Can we say Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?

What type of rock is formed from sediment?

Just a blank stare.  Followed by, I don’t know, soil?

That’s when I turned green, my clothes ripped and I became a screaming hulk mom.

Are you kidding me?  Are you serious?  Seriously, don’t you see the word sediment in sedimentary rock?  How can you not see that?  We’ve just gone over this at least 1/2 a dozen times?  Do you know how much it would cost to pay me for tutoring you?  I’m a professional, I screamed at the top of my lungs!  I do this for a living!  People would pay me money to do what I just did for you for free, and you can’t be bothered to pay attention?  Are you kidding me?  Soil is a type of rock I screamed?

At this point, anyone with the good sense God gave them would have walked away, taken a moment, gathered themselves, sipped some water, anything to stop themselves!  Did I?  Oh, NO!  I continued!

Has your brain turned to mush from too many video games today?  Haven’t you been studying this chapter for a while now?  This is exactly why I’ve told you to bring this book home every night so we don’t have to cram a whole chapter  at one time.  How do you expect to pass the test tomorrow?  Weren’t you paying any attention at all?

On and on I went.  Oh yes, I went on.  We then reviewed for 20 minutes and accomplished more in that 20 minutes than we had in the previous 2 hours.  My voice is sore from screaming.  I’m sure even the neighbors can tell you the different kind of rocks! 

I admit I have never conducted a study session while screaming the questions at my students, but I did for my son.  I screamed questions,  he timidly answered. 

What have I done?  I’m sure I have now added several therapy sessions to the ones he will need in the future .  Professional?  Won’t somebody just shoot me now!

I’ve Found Face Book!

January 22, 2010

At the age of 51 I have finally given in to peer pressure and now have a page on face book!  What is the world coming to?  Me, face book, can’t imagine the two meshing together.  Yet, I spent 3 days in a haze of face booking .  It is now all a blur of setting up security locks, adding pictures, sending messages, writing messages, learning new lingo like “status”, connecting to friends and family.  The first day, I thought I would only have maybe 12 friends.  I wanted to keep it simple.  By the end of the third day, I had 70 some friends, had links, and found the thrill of  “chatting”! I believe I didn’t shower or leave my computer for 3 days straight.   My husband and son have called Dr. Drew.  They feel I need face book rehab!

My husband sat me down, looked me straight in the eye, and asked what has happened to you?  Remember when we were first married?  Aren’t you the woman who refused to get a microwave?  Didn’t you argue with me about whether it would save time?  Didn’t you insist we not spend the money on one?  Didn’t you swear you would never use it ?  

Yes, but I did give in didn’t I? You brought home one anyway and look at us now!  We don’t eat anything that isn’t “nuked”, grilled, or carried out!  I’ve forgotten, do we still have a stove?

Aren’t you the woman who refused to let go of our 8 track tapes, even after our player quit playing?

Okay, I admit that I did that.  But I really loved those tapes.  We had some great times in college to those tapes!  Don’t forget, I have CD’s now.

So what is your excuse for keeping all your even older vinyl records?

Hey, there coming back!

You hate new technology.  You still refuse to have a phone that takes pictures!

Oh, by the way, now that you mention that.  Honey, could I get a new phone?  I really think I would like one of those new ones that take pictures!  I can see how it would be really helpful, like if I got in a car accident.  I could take a picture of the damages right away.  Don’t you think that would be a good idea?

So, here I come technology.  I admit, people have mocked me. Why, my family has had more than a few laughs on my account because of  this aversion I have to new things, especially techno stuff.  I admit I am slowly catching up, being pulled into this century kicking and screaming.  I admit I’m still hanging on to some remnants of the past.  I admit I have been wrong about almost  every kind of technological advance.  Okay, microwaves are very good things, as are cd’s,  mp3 players, computers, and cell phones that are like little computers all wrapped up in one.

Just one thing, I don’t think I will ever get one of those book thing – a – ma- jigs.  Have you heard of them?  It’s like a book, but no pages to turn?  I just don’t get it?  So what you can store hundreds of books on one!  I could never get all that read anyway 🙂

New Use for Febreze!

January 20, 2010

The other weekend my parents were over for a visit.  My son had played outside and was way too dirty to take out to eat.

You need to go take a bath. 

I’m not dirty.

Oh yes you are.  Go take and bath so we can go to  lunch with Grandma and Grandpa.

He went upstairs.  I heard the shower going.  It stopped almost immediately.  My mommy antennae popped up.  Thundering down the stairs he came, hardly minutes after he had gone up.

Did you take a bath?  Your hair isn’t even wet!

He smiled his huge heart melting grin  and said, No.  Look, I sprayed febreze all over me.  Now I don’t stink.

We were all laughing so hard, I couldn’t be mad.  I had to admit, he didn’t smell anymore.  So, off we went to lunch.  Febrezed clothes and all!

PS. I hate to admit it, but about a week later I decided to febreze him myself.  What’s a mom to do?  No time, a stinky little boy, and the bottle of  febreze was right there!  Thank you febreze!

I want to be a policeman

January 20, 2010

My son and I were going somewhere the other day, when a police car stopped in the middle of the intersection, lights flashing, siren blaring.  My son was full of excitemant and a thousand questions! 

 Yes, see, he has stopped there to stop traffic.  Wait, listen, do you hear some more sirens?  Look, here comes an ambulance.  

 That’s why I want to be a policeman when I grow up. 

 Because you want to help people? 

 No, because I want to be able to turn on the siren like that.  That way, cars will get out of my way and I can go wherever I want really fast! 

I immediately burst into laughter!  Of course that’s why an 8 yr old boy wants to be a cop!  Heck, that’s probably why many policeman become cops?  Little boys in grown up bodies, driving fast with blaring sirens!  Oh, I’m sure they say it’s because they want to help people, but we women know, it’s all about the “toys”, cars, guns, sirens, every boy’s dream.  🙂

Laughter of a Child

November 15, 2009

I can hear my son and his friend upstairs.  There are lots of bumps and thumps , I don’t even want to go look.  Most of all, there is laughter.  Sweet laughter of two  8 yr old boys doing heaven knows what.  It lifts my spirits.  I can’t be doing everything wrong and still have such a happy child.  His laughter sweeps thru the house like beams of light from God.  As much as I get frustrated at his behavior sometimes, I just can’t even remember life without him.  Just letting him be a kid, with his best friend, being silly, making fishing poles from hockey sticks, digging for worms in our neighbor’s yard!  Completely destroying the whole house with his high energy, creativeness, and his chocolate lab.  Can life get better than that?  Here’s to the laughter of a child, my son:)